This past week has been better. After LOTS of praying for patience and guidance, Hyrum and I are getting on quite a bit better. I am so grateful for personal revelation. I am glad that Heavenly Father knows Hyrum and what he needs and that He can tell me and help me provide just the right environment for His precious child to thrive. For example Hyrum needs to develop his independent nature but gets easily overwhelmed, so while choices are important, I have to be careful not to offer him too many options and I have to give him a time limit to make his choice. I'm amazed that at barely two years old he is starting to understand "if...then" and consequences. I don't think I was giving him enough credit before. Also, he really loves music. I don't know if it's a stage or if it will always be something he loves, but it sure does wonders for calming him down. We sing primary songs for about 15 minutes before bed and getting him to go to sleep hasn't been a struggle for days. I can also notice a difference in his mood depending on whether I have NPR on in the background or the classical music station. Later in the day it doesn't matter so much, but breakfast is not the time for news.
I've also learned that my mentality needs to change. So far I've gotten away with simply making it impossible (or at least really difficult) for him to do what I don't want him to do. I could shut doors or hide things, but his memory and ingenuity no longer allow me to effectively use these methods. He asked for banana muffins (pronounced moo-fins) at every meal time for three days straight until we finally made them. He also has these little balls that make a mess and end up everywhere that he loves. I hide them every time he goes down for a nap, and if they aren't right where he left them when he gets up he lets me know about it. He's also learned how to open his bedroom door. The first time he figured it out was about 20 minutes into his nap time and I could NOT get him to go back down. This is what happens around 5pm when Hyrum misses a nap:
He slept on the kitchen floor for nearly an hour, and then was wide awake when bedtime rolled around. These instances place me in a new stage of mothering. I have to learn how to teach and discipline and allow him to obey. I can see how Satan's plan might have seemed like a good idea at the time. Making the right option the only option perhaps is easier, but not nearly as character building. Plus, I'm not always going to be there to shut the door and keep him from temptation. It's hard work, but I can see how very important it is. Heaven help us as we both learn how to be two.
7 comments:
It is so hard to figure out what they need. Sometimes when Alexis is ornery it's because she is going through a stage, and sometimes it's because she has an ear infection or something. Then one day she is an absolute angel. I am impressed how hard you try to understand your child and how hard you think about your child rearing. I should probably try to be more methodical.
Im glad things are starting to go smoother, especially with Matthew away. On a side note, I am changing my blogging email, so I will need a new invite from you to view the blog on my new email. If you would, send me an invite to cnlinford@gmail.com
Thanks!
And ps, your boys are so stinkin cute!
Sometimes I wonder how much Warren understands too. This discipline thing is hard with limited vocabulary.
Amen, and Amen!! I'm telling you, the whole prayer thing has been AMAZING in helping me parent William better. Heinz has been easy, we've just know, but Willy, I've been going about it all the wrong way. We still have things to learn and things to change, but it's been so much better!
Julianne, you are so amazing. I wish I had had half your insite and ability to understand what is going on in your kids' heads. You think to pray about things that never occured to me. I am learning from you. I love you all so much.
MOM
Music works wonders for people of all ages - and in all sorts of situations. That's why I have an I Pod with me at all times. When I was a little kid, I'd sing MYSELF to sleep. The whole strong-willed thing is really interesting. Maddie Grace - my wee cousin and mini-me - has such temper tantrums sometimes. Then again, so did I. I still get unbearably cranky when I am tired or I am in pain
Yea for personal revelation. It's such a gift isn't it? And it's funny how different kids are. If I put on primary music, they scream at me, "It's not Sunday! We're not at church!" I'll have to figure that one out...
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